Chapter 6: Hunted

Theme: Security

1) "They would work together, fight together, stay together. An unbreakable bond united the crew. For many members it was the only support system they had. It was family." (Page 111)

Other Wes says this quote in reference to his drug corporation. Everyone in this corporation had a role: hitters who dealt with the money, corner boys who watched out for cops, housemen in charge of distribution. This system, which ran analogously to a Fortune 500 business, provided these boys with structure, rules, and a community, which helped them to feel safe and a part of something, and group identity is a common tenet of security. The ways in which the members of his drug crew worked together and supported one another, even jumping to violence to protect each other, gave Other Wes a false sense of security with this hierarchal system. He thought that the system would protect him and give him that "family" environment he lacked at home. The problem with this is that this environment, the only environment where Other Wes felt safe and protected, was the environment that was landing him in such insecure situations (such as later in the chapter when he is arrested for dealing). Other Wes may have felt that this lifestyle was his only option, and thus he may have persuaded himself into believing this false security. Other Wes had given up on school because after missing so much due to his six-month arrest and the birth of his first child, he felt that he was too far behind to catch up; this insecurity in his educational future led him to seek other avenues to feel secure. Since Other Wes did not feel secure at school, he thought that the drug corporation would be a "safer" option, despite all the known risks. Security is a relative concept, and it means different things to different people. To Wes, true security never really existed in his family, school or social lives, so he invented, rationalized and most importantly, convinced himself of the concept of security in what is largely considered one of the most insecure trades in the world: drugs.

2) "It was a risk and Wes knew it. But taking risks is at the heart of the drug enterprise and scared money didn't make money. " (Page 113)

This quote is stated when Other Wes is choosing to deal drugs to a man whom he inwardly believes is a cop, or at least someone who is out of place and could potentially make trouble for him. Wes understood how dangerous his actions were, and what they could lead to, but because of the aforementioned security he felt within his drug dealing crew, he didn't fully grasp what the consequences could be. Even if he did understand the possible results, like many teenagers, Other Wes had a feeling of invincibility in which he believed that he could never be caught. This invincible attitude goes hand and hand with Other Wes's unevidenced sense of security. Another aspect of Other Wes's conception of security was the idea that money would give him safety. Other Wes knows that because he is not attending school, he won't be able to get one of the higher paying jobs that requires an education. He may deep down know that his lack of education is an insecurity, and thus he is overcompensating by getting so deep into this drug trade. He is placing the energy he would have put into his education and security that this education would have provided, into a trade that gives him the same feeling of security, even if this feeling is false. Now that Other Wes has a child, he may be beginning to feel panicked and insecure about how he will care for this child, so the idea of the money that he can make with the drug trade allows him to feel secure. This can explain the poor choices he made with the policeman who was pretending to be a druggie because although Other Wes saw the signs that this potential deal was a farce, he overlooked them because he wanted the safety the money could provide, and he never thought that the business that made him feel so secure could land him in that much trouble, and thus, shatter his finely tuned but ultimately false sense of security.

3) "But it is important that you understand that the chances are not in your favor, and you have to have some backup plans." (Page 116)

This quote is said by Author Wes's uncle after Author Wes shares his goals of making it to the NBA. Author Wes believed that this was a totally attainable goal due to the recruiting letters he was getting from colleges, but when he shares this goal, his uncle begins to gently explain that this may not be the best plan. His uncle goes on to break down the numbers and probability of Author Wes actually achieving this goal, and thus begins to break Author Wes's security in his future plans. Like Other Wes, Author Wes has this sense of invincibility in which he creates a false sense of security in obtaining what he wants from life, shown through his practicing of draft day handshakes and interview quotes, all of which contributed to his fantasy world of a secure, star athlete future. When given this news, Author Wes partly understands what his uncle is saying to him, but he knows that if he accepts this reality, his manufactured security in his future would disappear. Thus, he mostly brushes this advice off by trying to get another game going, but this dose of reality does resonate with him. In this way, Author Wes is different than Other Wes because at least he sees the burgeoning wisps of reality and knows that eventually he will have to face it and come up with a "backup plan," whereas Other Wes continues to believe in his false security of the drug-dealing lifestyle and thus, ends up in big trouble when that plan falls through due to yet another arrest. The ideas of security and backup plans effectively highlight the stringent dichotomy between the two Weses in both the way they create their senses of security, and how they deal with the obstacles to achieving that security.

4) "I felt like being at military school was keeping me in a bubble, ignorant of what was going on with my people on the outside...This uniform had become a force field that kept the craziness of the world outside from getting too close to me, but I wondered if it was just an illusion." (Page 118)

This quote is said by Author Wes after receiving a letter from his Baltimore friend Justin in which he hears news that Justin's mom is sick and, consequently, Justin's grades and school life had been slipping. He also learns that a kid, whom he had previously gone tagging with, had been arrested on drug charges. This letter comes as a shock and a reality check to Author Wes whose time at military school had blinded him from the issues back home that could have easily been his own. When he put on his uniform, it was not just a piece of cloth, but it was a shield that symbolized all of the principles of his school and his new life that made him feel safe and a part of something so secure. It truly was a force field in the sense that it kept away all of the dangers that had previously plagued Author Wes. However, when he received that letter, it made him realize that he may be secure, and his school may be secure, but that doesn't mean that anything back home had changed. Life there was still as dangerous as ever, and it only made him feel worse about the family and friends that he wasn't there to protect since he was living in this "bubble" of safety. Author Wes started to wonder what this security really meant if it was only safe for himself, not the people he loved and cared for. Author Wes wasn't sure if this was security or, as he said above, merely an "illusion."

5) "Years earlier, I had run through these same woods with all of my might, looking for safety, trying to get away from campus. Tonight, I ran through the same woods looking for safety, but in the other direction." (Page 122)

This quote is a clear example of the irony that demonstrates how deeply Author Wes's perception of security has changed through his experiences in military school. At the start of his time in military school, Author Wes was very rebellious and attempted to run away many times through a path in the woods. Back then, all he knew was the Bronx life, and however dangerous it may have been, it was his home and the place he felt the most safe; thus he was running from the military life that was new and frightening back to his home which was known and comforting. However, now he was running from a possible fight (something he never would have done in the Bronx) back into the security of his school that was now his comforting home. If Author Wes had continued to grow up in the Bronx, he probably would have fought with the man who had called him the n-word because it would have seemed like the safest thing to do to defend his honor. However, now that he's in this military school, Author Wes has to think much more about the consequences and what it would mean for his future. Before running away, Author Wes talks about what his mother would say when she found out, whether he could get kicked out of school, or what his father intended his life to be. These are things that Author Wes never would have considered before because they didn't play into the security of his future. With his changed perception of his world and what his future would be came a changed perception of Author Wes's security and how he would attain and keep this security.